How to shut people up about my veganism?

[Password]

Hi there

I'm new here, very glad to have found this forum!

I've turned vegan this week, after having been vegetarian for quite a bit... now, the problem is, my fiancé and other people seem to think I am stupid and just want to be anticonformist. this is obviously not the case, and even if it were, I do not see how this would be problematic for them.
I'm not sure about how to help people accept my choices... any ideas?

[beforewisdom]

1. Get educated. Know your facts. Remember the names of sources with well respected
reputations.

2. Don't bring up the facts until THEY bring it up in a conversation first. Don't give them
an excuse to accuse you of proselytizing.

3. Don't talk with them about it over a meal. Tell if they are interested you can right
down a list of good books for them. That usually shuts them up. Do it diplomatically.
Tell them you don't like talking about such things over food, that you like their company
and you were looking forward to chilling out with them.


4. In regards to #2, with close friends and family, if you have to, make a case for
veganism *ONCE* and never again. Pushing people about that kind of thing
never has good results. If you feel an urge to do more join a group and go pass out
leaflets to strangers.

5. Don't bring it up at work, unless someone else brings it up for you. Then try
try to diplomatically shut the conversation down, see #3.

[xrodolfox]

6) Get strong and fit and be faster/fitter/stronger than anyone who argues with you.

[Konstantin]

I agree with all the 6 above.

It's important that people realise that it's not something you've done either on a whim or for the wrong reasons (eg to annoy people, follow a fad, etc.). Knowing your stuff is essential. When people realise that you have a good understanding of nutrition and how your food fits into this it's a short step to noticing the undercurrent: the vegan knowns more about food that the non vegan. Maybe that's because the person with the good knowledge realises vegan is good.

For want of a better word, 'presentation' is important, and as referred to above, don't rant on about it. If you're getting tired of the constant ill-informed questions, ask if there's something else you can talk about for a change and point out that there's loads of good resources if they still haven't got to understand it yet, and give them that book/website list.

Sometimes it's important to identify different categories: people who are interested, people who can't assemble info to understand it, people who just get upset with vegans and want to prove you wrong using any sort of false info etc.. Try to treat them accordingly and don't waste your time/energy. Spending some time with your fiance going through any specific concerns and explaining your motivation has to be time well spent, I hope that works out and the info gets through.

[lobsteriffic]

4. In regards to #2, with close friends and family, if you have to, make a case for
veganism *ONCE* and never again. Pushing people about that kind of thing
never has good results. If you feel an urge to do more join a group and go pass out
leaflets to strangers.

I think this is so important. In my misguided youth, when I was vegetarian, I would go on and on and on about vegetarianism to my family. It never resulted in anything positive.

[loveliberate]

Duct tape?

[beforewisdom]

That is not a very hippy-dipply Portlandia kind of thing to say

[loveliberate]

Oh right... How about a peer facilitated intuitive counseling session where we all learn to accept one another as simply having different paths in life?

[baldy]

people seem to think I am stupid and just want to be anticonformist...

I have been vegan for years and people still say this to me. Often however people will surprise me and the ones that give the most abuse will be the first to stand up for your veganism, like always checking there is a vegan option.

Sucks that your fiancé is not supportive, maybe make them some vegan cupcakes?

[beforewisdom]

Oh right... How about a peer facilitated intuitive counseling session where we all learn to accept one another as simply having different paths in life?

LOL. Better.

[beforewisdom]

Sucks that your fiancé is not supportive, maybe make them some vegan cupcakes?

A blowjob with dairy free whipped cream could be as effective with far less time in the kitchen.

[Password]

Haha! Like the tips on the cupcakes and the blowjob!
I agree with the first, more innocent, ideas on showing off your own self to demonstrate the healthiness of veganism! I must stop losing weight though because apparently its starting to get too much... Maybe I should pack up on carbohydrates! I believe I'm having too much protein and combined with sport it makes me loose weight.
Thanks guys, I'm really glad with the answers I got

[baldy]

Maybe I should pack up on carbohydrates! I believe I'm having too much protein and combined with sport it makes me loose weight.

Sounds like you are not having enough calories, too much protein will not magically make you lose weight. Best thing to do is write down and post what you eat on a normal day plus how much exercises you do.
Then people will give there feedback, based one there experience. Often new vegans over estimate how much they eat and under estimate how much they need.

I one week you shouldn't have lost a noticeable amount of weight?

[Password]

Well, I eat two meals a day which include tofu at midday with lots of vegetables and a fruit salad for desert. For diner I have whole meal pasta or rice with a soup of some kind and a salad. And for breakfast I usually have fresh carrot juice...
I go jogging for an hour every morning before breakfast and enjoy walking for an hour I. The afternoons with my daughter in the babycarrier.

Oh, and in one week I lost about three kilos.

[beforewisdom]

Well, I eat two meals a day which include tofu at midday with lots of vegetables and a fruit salad for desert. For diner I have whole meal pasta or rice with a soup of some kind and a salad. And for breakfast I usually have fresh carrot juice...
I go jogging for an hour every morning before breakfast and enjoy walking for an hour I. The afternoons with my daughter in the babycarrier.

Oh, and in one week I lost about three kilos.

You just described a weight loss regime. Only two meals a day and jogging for an hour every day.

Off the top of my head I could recommend:

Eating 3 meals a day and possibly adding in between meal snacks
Include a legume or legume food with dinner, just pasta or whole grains will not give you a significant amount of protein
Eat more food with concentrated calories, ie, nut/nut butters, avocados, full fat soy foods, dried fruit. breads, pastas

Print the Daily Recommendations for Vegan Adults out onto a single page, and go through it each day for a week or two as a checklist. Keep adding more calories until your weight stabilizes.